By Ginger Schmidt
PICAYUNE — “As a father of two very beautiful and loving children, I’m compelled to reach out to other men who have children. My desire is to express the importance of the active role of the father and the effects it can have. The active role of the father rotates around being involved in every area of your son’s or daughter’s life.
“One of my main purposes for writing this book is to bring about awareness and exposure to every father and to every man who desires to be a father someday. I certainly believe that my experience as a fatherless child and as a father will bring about some questions about what type of father you are, or will soon become,” writes Lawrence Bolar in his first book, “Nothing Substitutes Time.” Bolar said he hopes the book will help bring more importance to the role of a father in a child’s life.
Bolar graduated from Picayune Memorial High School in 1991 and attended Pearl River Community College till he transferred to Virginia State University. Upon his college graduation, 1993, Bolar remained in Virginia where he now works as an assistant principle at Petersburg High School. He resides with his wife RaShawn and his two children Lauren and Christian.
Working with youth for the past eight years as an assistant principal, and previous to that in a correctional center, Bolar saw a need to share to his personal experience growing up as a fatherless child to help others overcome what often leads to a very challenging life.
“My goal is to encourage [young men] to stay focused,” said Bolar. He said he turned his negative situation around by staying focused on positive things, and he hopes that his book will help others find that same road in their own lives.
Being a father is a huge responsibility, said Bolar. He also said that there are tasks in child raising that are often viewed as more feminine oriented tasks, such as diapering or scheduling doctor office visits, when instead these tasks should be viewed as an equal responsibility to be shared between a mother and a father.
His resulting self-help book, “Nothing Substitutes Time,” is a lesson through self-exploration. Through his autobiography, Bolar tries to point out the different types of fathers and challenges readers to examine the type of father that they are and maybe reevaluate and discover the type of father they would like to become.
Throughout the book, Bolar speaks frankly using mature language and themes, and he does not attempt to sugar coat how he feels about fathers, like his own, that completely chose not to participate in the upbringing of their child or children.
Other themes the book explores is being truthful with children and how to respond to questions children ask involving delicate subject matters, the role of the stepfather and the importance of God in a parent-child relationship.
Bolar would like to thank some of his former Picayune classmates for their overwhelming support and encouragement of his book and, in particular, he said, his friends Nickie Smith, Susan Salloum-Michael and Susan Prestridge-Davey were especially inspirational throughout his efforts. “They have been very encouraging and have helped in getting the word out,” said Bolar.
“Nothing Substitutes Time” is available for purchase on the Internet at www.lawrencebolar.com, amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com.
